I've spent some time thinking about my recent
shift at the mental health rehabilitation hospital and it seems to have crept
into one of my dreams.
Last night I dreamt I lived within an institution because I had Scruft's syndrome (this isn't a real condition, merely a figure of my imagination). The main symptoms of Scruft's included problems with planning, intellectual disability and poor fine motor coordination but only at meal times (very odd but it is a dream after all!). I was lucky enough to not suffer from the intellectual symptoms, however because I was labelled with the condition I was forever being treated as if I had a lower IQ.
One of the activities we did was one where we had to pour soap mixture into different shaped moulds, using the colours indicated in the key given. I was chatting with the person next to me and accidentally poured blue into the orange mould. Before I had time to clean the mould and refill it, my support workers had already started marking down my mistakes on their clipboards which would 'confirm' that I had a learning disability.
This reminded me of the 1973 Rosenhan study where pseudo-patients we admitted to a psychiatric hospital after describing fake schizophrenic symptoms such as heading the sound 'hollow' and 'thud' in their heads. Once within the institution they were to act normally (rather than acting as if they had schizophrenia) however it took them many months before they were released. If people think you have a condition, they'll start treating you differently and wrongly interpret your behaviour to match the diagnostic manual. For example, if one of the pseudo-patients told a nurse that they didn't really have schizophrenia and they were playing an important part in a psychological study, this would probably be classified as a grandiose delusion (a symptom of schizophrenia).
For me, I felt this dream gave me insight into what stigma may feel like. I felt judged, frustrated and truly misunderstood. I had become Scruft's syndrome, I felt I was being treated as a condition rather than a person who needed help.
Thankfully this was only a dream and the rehab centre I've been working at is nothing like this. There are only 5 inpatients and the staff know them very well. They are very much treated as individuals; they all have their own stories, personalities and many have complicated psychiatric backgrounds. I really enjoy working there and am touched that the manager offered me a full-time job after my performance on my first shift. Obviously I couldn't take it up as I'll be back to Brighton in January but I have been offered some extra shifts next week.
Last night I dreamt I lived within an institution because I had Scruft's syndrome (this isn't a real condition, merely a figure of my imagination). The main symptoms of Scruft's included problems with planning, intellectual disability and poor fine motor coordination but only at meal times (very odd but it is a dream after all!). I was lucky enough to not suffer from the intellectual symptoms, however because I was labelled with the condition I was forever being treated as if I had a lower IQ.
One of the activities we did was one where we had to pour soap mixture into different shaped moulds, using the colours indicated in the key given. I was chatting with the person next to me and accidentally poured blue into the orange mould. Before I had time to clean the mould and refill it, my support workers had already started marking down my mistakes on their clipboards which would 'confirm' that I had a learning disability.
This reminded me of the 1973 Rosenhan study where pseudo-patients we admitted to a psychiatric hospital after describing fake schizophrenic symptoms such as heading the sound 'hollow' and 'thud' in their heads. Once within the institution they were to act normally (rather than acting as if they had schizophrenia) however it took them many months before they were released. If people think you have a condition, they'll start treating you differently and wrongly interpret your behaviour to match the diagnostic manual. For example, if one of the pseudo-patients told a nurse that they didn't really have schizophrenia and they were playing an important part in a psychological study, this would probably be classified as a grandiose delusion (a symptom of schizophrenia).
For me, I felt this dream gave me insight into what stigma may feel like. I felt judged, frustrated and truly misunderstood. I had become Scruft's syndrome, I felt I was being treated as a condition rather than a person who needed help.
Thankfully this was only a dream and the rehab centre I've been working at is nothing like this. There are only 5 inpatients and the staff know them very well. They are very much treated as individuals; they all have their own stories, personalities and many have complicated psychiatric backgrounds. I really enjoy working there and am touched that the manager offered me a full-time job after my performance on my first shift. Obviously I couldn't take it up as I'll be back to Brighton in January but I have been offered some extra shifts next week.
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